What Are They? Where Are They? What Are They Like?

The Actor’s Husband is hands down one of our favorite swinger characters. Far as I know, we never said a word to him, I’ll have to ask Kate if she talked to him at all; she doesn’t think so.

We happened across The Actor’s Husband at a Splash takeover event in the fall of 2022.

Splash takeovers are kind of regional to semi national events. Heavy southeast flavor, but plenty of people from across the country. Figure 400 people (give or take) at a Splash event. Kate and I played with couples from California and Colorado while we were there. More on Splash in a few paragraphs; first, back to The Actor and The Actor’s Husband…..

The Actor and her Husband were hard to miss. He was an older guy, maybe the oldest there, tho it’s a sin to pigeonhole him in that way. Suffice it to say he had been around the block a time or several. Should we cross paths again I’m going to ask him to pick his brain about the “old days” of swinging.

This guy was the definition of giving zero fucks. The pool area during the event was clothing optional. For the most part, this was women going topless. There were a few who were nude, as were a handful of guys. The Actor’s Husband was one of them.

The pool area was decent sized, and probably more than spacious on a normal day. A takeover isn’t a normal day. Swingers love pools, and the pool area was packed. I’d guess they had 75–100 chaise lounge chairs around the pool. They were all staked out / claimed before 8 AM each day.

The Actor’s Husband strutted (and yes, that’s the most accurate word) around the pool area seemingly nonstop. He had a purposeful yet measured stride, standing tall, and leaning slightly back, puffing his chest out as he walked. He wore three things: sunglasses, a bling necklace, and a cock ring. Well, probably flip flops too. I don’t know if I can think of a guy who was ever more comfortable in his skin or more in his element. I heard old ZZ Top in my head when he’d saunter past.

The Actor’s Husband’s wife would have been, well, the Actor. (Is that sentence actually writable in a correct manner?

We dubbed her The Actor because she was the law breaker in the pool area. Actor in the old cop show way, not like an actor actor….”An unkown actor stole Mrs. Snuffy’s biscuts” sort of thing.

Open / flagrant sexual contact wasn’t permitted at this takeover in public areas. In what was a surprise to no one, a couple hundred half naked to naked swingers pushed the boundaries of this “rule”. None more so than The Actor.

It was later in the day and we were fortunate enough to grab a pair of chaise on the far side of the pool. Our neighbors were a couple from Arkansas. Mr. Arkansas was another of the few nude men. He and his wife were very pleasant, as was everyone there. Mrs. Arkansas at some point got up and maybe went to their room. Cue the Actor.

We had noticed her earlier in the day, and vaguely knew who she was when she sat at the foot of the chaise occupied by Mr. Arkansas.

Before long, we noticed a strategically place towel covering her hand as she started rubbing him. That was passable, easy to look the other way. I suspect she must have tripped or lost her balance in some way at some point because as the towel fell away, her mouth (clearly) accidentally landed on his cock. The head bobbing was slightly less than subtle than the towel covered wank. Kate and I damn near took a stroke trying to keep our composure when Mr. Arkansas’ wife appeared back on the scene. She had a look on her face that neither of us had never seen before.

While The Actor was earning her Sam & Kate name, her husband didn’t break stride. He was Bad, he was Nationwide.

A swinger hotel takeover is kind of exactly what it sounds like. A group of swingers get together and rent an entire hotel for a night or a weekend. Typically, there is a company of some sort that runs them and handles the logistics. Swinger travel agents. There are smaller “takeover’s” that may be a floor of a hotel, or a couple adjoining suites. Some of these are more in the house party realm.

The bigger takeovers are typically advertised in some manner on one or more of the swinger sites. The smaller ones tend to be more word of mouth; more like a house party.

Like anything having to do with a hotel, you’re going to get what you pay for. By a mile, our Puerto Vallarta trip / takeover was the most expensive, and it was worth every penny. It was also all inclusive, so there’s that.

On the other end, we’ve left a weekend takeover on Saturday morning. The attendees were great; I, Sam, had probably my best swinger sex the night we were there. (Kate had a less than optimum experience. I’ve posted it before, I’ll say it again….guys, talk to your doctor and if doable get the pills. Seriously, to be in the swing space and not is almost malpractice.) The facility was well past its prime and was decidedly shady. From what I’ve seen, the group that runs that takeover has moved to a different location. Good call.

We’d suggest doing the legwork. If you’re interested in a particular takeover, talk to people who have been before or are signed up to go. Talk to a bunch of people; swingers love to talk. Talk to the organizers as well. Look for group chats either from the organizers site or one of the swinger sites (SLS, SDC, Kasidie)

The energy at a takeover is usually awesome. Upbeat, happy, lots of joy and smiles. Some couples are there for the party scene, some are there to see what swinging is all about, some are there looking to do as much play as possible. Everyone is there for basically the same reason. We haven’t seen shitshows or much drama at all.

Kate and I have learned to not go in with any expectations, and to roll with whatever the day holds. We’re swingers, and we like to play, so, we’re looking to play. If that doesn’t happen, and we’re forced to go to bed with each other, well, there’s just no downside.

The longer the takeover, the better is our take. Sometimes the 2 night weekend takeovers can feel a bit compressed. We stretched our last Splash trip by a couple days (5 nights at the hotel). We’re doing the same thing this fall.

You’ll see couples ranging in age from their 20’s to their 70’s. I’d guess the bulk are between 40 and 60. Outside of the 40–60 range, it’s more a younger than older crowd.

Given that it’s a swinger event, there’s probably also going to be a place for public or semipublic sex. These “playrooms” can run the gamut from orgie rooms to full blown BDSM dungeons (well, maybe not full blown). Some smaller events these rooms may be open all the time, larger events they’re usually a nighttime thing. Of course, given you’re in a hotel, play at any time in a room is possible.

Tips from Kate:

· Step out of your comfort zone and talk to people; don’t wait for them to approach you.

· If they’re having “Theme Nights”, participate. For example, a neon / glow night is common. Bring clothes that glow and wear them.

· A lot of couples like to decorate their room’s door. If that’s your thing, have fun with it!

· Plan your meals. Eating at the hotel restaurant can get expensive.

Here’s a quick list of takeovers we’ve either heard of or been to. It’s far from complete, I’ll update as we become aware of more:

– Swinger Open Poly (swingeropenpoly.com). West coast and international.

– Splash (splashtakeovers.com) Southeast / national

– Intimate Parties Group (IPG) (intimatepartiesgroup.com) Northeast regional

– Club Giggity (clubgiggity.com) Northeast regional

– Secret Sinsations (secretsinsations.com) Northeast regional

– Pour Some Sugar On Me (pssom.com) Northeast regional

– Libertine Events (Podcastapaloza) (libertineevents.com) National and international.

Last week we booked with Splash for their Ft. Lauderdale takeover this fall. Will you be there??

Thanks for reading!! Be kind to your self and everyone!!

Sam & Kate