The Story of Kate and Her First Girlfriend

Remember how weird the spring of 2020 was?

Kate and I are no different in that we have a story or two from that time. Man, they were scary days at first. Soon enough it became as much about politics as it did biology, but those early days, damn.

I don’t want to get lost in Covid talk, but it sets the table for how Lisa entered our relationship.

By way of an introduction if you’re reading us for the first time……Kate and I are a married couple in our 50’s whose relationship is Ethically Non-Monogamous (ENM). We’re swingers, our marriage is open; we have sex with other people. We’re in a committed relationship, and somewhere on the polyamorous spectrum; Kate has a boyfriend (or two) and is a Hotwife. It’s neither of our first marriages. We met in a 12 step meeting; we’re each more than a decade sober now. If you’re curious about how this all works, we talk about our relationship in varying degrees of depth in other posts. We have an email address listed in our “about” page if you would like to contact us.

Covid was a slower, longer burn for us than I think most people. It was still a page 4 or 5 story in the states when I landed in Beijing on my way to Thailand. That was the first week of January. Covid was on my radar, it was part of my travel briefing. I had traveled in Asia a couple decades earlier when SARS first popped up, and thought it would be similar to that.

Not long after that trip, I found myself in Singapore for a couple weeks. Covid was page two, or below the fold on page 1 by then. I was detained (briefly) by customs on arrival when they noticed the China stamp from a few weeks ago in my passport. I was working at a major university, they required that I have my temperature taken daily when I arrived each morning, and give a brief medical interview. My hotel took the temperature of everyone as they walked in as well. Masks, never a strange sight in Asia, were becoming more and more prevalent.

My Asian travel at that point probably caused Kate and I a missed swinging opportunity. Kate had met a couple while I was in Singapore, they hit it off great, and a meet with the four of us was scheduled. Well, the night of the meet, the wife of the couple was decidedly freaked out by me and my travel and didn’t want to be there. She got drunk, and that meal was the last we heard of or from them.

In the latter part of 2019, Kate and I had opened up a recovery house. Kate’s home at that point was attached to her beauty shop, and had I think 7 usable bedrooms. She was very involved in the local recovery community and had taken a couple of women in over the previous years to help them out. There was (and remains) a need for transitional housing for newly clean and sober women. We got the bedrooms fixed up and as they finished treatment, some women moved in. At the peak, there were 5 women living there. (This was totally above board. As much as a “Dear Penthouse Forum” vibe as this has, it was platonic.)

My next bit of travel was supposed to have been a month long trip to Iceland starting in late February. In the middle of our third week, life started shutting down. Fearing we’d be stranded on the island for an unknown period, management halted our project and we flew out on Friday March 13th.

I was “quarantined” for 14 days when I got home. During that time, the shutdown in PA happened, and Kate found her beauty salon closed. None of us were sure what was going to happen next, so we decided I should move in. Kate and I rode the lockdown out together, along with 4 new to recovery women. Antibacterial wipes at the door, Narcan in the bathroom medicine cabinets.

During my Iceland adventure, Kate made a significant change to her hair style; she went VERY short and butch; spikey and platinum blonde. I LOVED it!! So, as it happens did Lisa. A refresher on our timeline….Kate had her first solo encounter with another woman a couple months prior to this and was very much in girl sex mode.

Lisa is a bit younger than Kate, about midway between her and her kids. Lisa isn’t bi, she’s a lesbian. Kate has known this forever. They met when Lisa was in high school and she came into Kate’s shop with a friend to get their hair done. That relationship continues to this day. When I see the eyebrow wax heating up in the kitchen, I know Lisa isn’t too far behind.

In addition to her beauty shop, Kate had a body piercing business on the side for 10 years or so. She’s got no idea how many belly buttons she’s pierced; she remembers piercing Lisa’s left nipple back in the day tho.

A month or so after I moved in, Lisa saw short spikey haired Kate and I kiss on the front porch. She texted Kate and said she saw her kisssing someone. Kate, knowing her audience, and being in a very bi state of mind, responded “was it a boy or a girl?” In context, one of the all time great flirt lines.

This was around Mother’s Day. The mood and reality around Covid had started shifting by then. Honestly I don’t think it would have mattered. The boy or a girl line lit a very short fuse on what was to become a force of nature sexual relationship between Kate and Lisa.

Kate has had uneven experiences with cemetery sex since we’ve been together. Cemetery sex with Lisa was fire.

It was almost accidental in a way, and the first time they passed the kissing stage. They were out for a ride, just hanging out on a warm sunny spring day. For reasons that Kate can’t recall (I have a pretty good idea tho….) they stopped in the cemetery and Lisa pounced.

Kate is a dress wearing girlie girl, and she had a dress on this day. It wasn’t long before Lisa’s hands were moving up Kate’s thighs and pushing her panties to the side. Between the danger of being in a public place at high noon, and the raw sexual energy being released for the first time, Kate detonated in no time. To this day it remains one of Kates most intense sexual experiences.

Says Kate of the Lisa period: “That was the most orgasmic I’ve ever been. I had new experiences with her like scissoring, playing with a strap on.” “Also, just laying and touching each other was amazing.”

They played many times in our house, dodging (at first) the 4 other women who were living with us. Eventually, the secret became anything but, tho they always made an effort to be discrete.

I was never invited to join, nor did I ask. There were parts of this I struggled with initially. The energy between Kate and I was amazing tho and it was in this period that we developed a lot of our outlook on the lifestyle, fairness, and how we deal with sex involving one of us but not the other. It was trippy watching Kate and Lisa go upstairs while I was sitting on the couch we had watched Crazy Tiger People (Tiger King) on with half a dozen women, during a global pandemic.

The romance ran hot and heavy for a couple months and had burnt out by the 4th of July.

The full story of Kate and Lisa goes beyond the sex and them knowing each other for decades.

Lisa was a mess in a lot of ways in the spring of 2020. She wasn’t clean or sober, and tho physical substances were never an issue, (Kate never saw her use anything), the attitudes and behaviors of someone who’s “out there” eventually overwhelmed their physical connection. Yeah, it may not have been the most skillful relationship Kate has been in. Shit like this happens when force of nature sex is involved.

She struggled with the relationship Kate and I had. The Ethical Non-Monogamy thing was foreign to her, and she wasn’t all the way comfortable with it. Her and I did get along ok, tho it was strained.

It was during this time frame that Kate and I got engaged; Lisa was less than thrilled.

She made Kate crazy with more than just lust. Lisa was never on time for anything, and was prone to ghosting, sometimes for days at a time. Kate’s decades of salon ownership, and running tight appointment schedules, had made her a stickler for time. The military infused this in me, and Kate and I are very similar in how we approach time. Lisa, not so much.

The final straw was when the two of them had planned an overnight trip to a local-ish small town. Lisa ghosted, and Kate was pissed. Her and I went instead. We had a good time, but the energy was heavy.

Today, Lisa and Kate have a friendly relationship. She’s clean now, and as a result her life has less drama in it. I’d guess they see each other at least once a month, and text on and off. It’s been a while since they’ve had sex. Lisa has made no bones about being interested, Kate’s not there.

Kate and Lisa look good together. They have, to this day, an ease and comfort with each other that’s sexy as hell, all the more so because it’s not intended at all. We shall see what happens down the road….

Thanks for reading!! Be kind to yourself and others,

Sam & Kate

PS….If you’ve made it this far, please take a moment and clap (one or up to 50 times) for this post. It’s feedback for Kate and I, (comments and highlites are always welcome too!) and helps push the story up algorithmically. Thanks!!!